Follow your inner compass

I love, love, LOVE this post from Enjoy Birth entitled Birth is a Journey: Does it have to be life changing? As she so aptly puts it:

If you simplify different birth experiences I think they could fall into these 3 categories.

1. a traumatic journey

2. a normal journey

3. a magical journey

You know that old saying, One man's trash is another man's treasure? Well, similarly, there are times when one mom's trauma is another mom's magic. I've had a client who loved her epidural, and another one who would have considered an epidural to be a total defeat. I've read birth stories where a c-section was a horrible, frightening and emotionally scarring event, but in another story, the act of having a baby via surgery was totally peripheral to the fact that there was a baby born!

The reason birth is such a complicated and emotionally-charged topic for many people is because all of us have unique needs and expectations. Even though all of us have a mother and a navel to show how we were once a part of her, that's often where the similarities end! There is no one-size-fits-all approach to birth.

That being said, because each of us needs something different, I've been asked so many times this question: how do families prepare for the birth journey?

Here's what I recommend to my clients.

Be informed. Knowledge is one of the most powerful tools at your disposal. Knowing how your body works and what to expect during pregnancy, labor and postpartum is empowering in a way that nothing else can be. If you're the kind of person who learns best independently, look for literary resources recommended by credible birth institutions. DONA International, one of the oldest and most respected organizations of birth and postpartum doulas, has a required reading list for birth doulas (PDF) that's been approved by professionals for the purpose of preparing birth attendants. Or, if you prefer being educated in a group setting, find a childbirth class in your area. CAPPA and Lamaze are great places to start if you're looking for professional educators with solid classes based in research evidence. There are also methods that can provide the same research-based education that are geared toward specific birth philosophies, such as Bradley, Birthing From Within, and Hypnobabies. There are lots of different kinds of childbirth education, but no matter what educational 'flavor' you pick, I recommend selecting a class taught by a trained and certified instructor.

Thoughtfully choose medical care and other support providers. The great thing about all of the personalities in the birth community is that there's a care provider out there for everyone. I urge my clients (and potential clients) to interview more than one of care provider. It's important to have the right people on your team! Also, interviewing more than one care provider means you have a back-up plan in the event that one of those providers cannot attend your birth.

Research your birth place. If you're using a hospital or birth center, choose the one with the best care practices. The Coalition for Improving Maternity Services has a list of birth place principals which may help you ask in-depth questions when you tour facilities. If you've chosen a home birth, talk with your care provider to plan the details, such as supplies you'll need to have on-hand and transport procedures in the event of an emergency.

Follow your inner compass. I believe we're all capable of having a magical birth experience if we listen fearlessly to the inner voice inside us. Be centered, focused. Be open to the best experience possible.